...
It might be wise to brace yourselves, but, well, it can't be bad news. I know. And I went to the Metaphysical Zone to check.
Personality-wise, Snakes are not people who can be easily ignored. They possess a strong, charismatic presence and a charm which has been described by some astrologers as "bewitching" or "beguiling." With a penetrating eye and attention to the desires of their conquests, they're known as experts in the art of seduction.I never in my life tried to seduce anyone. Never.
People born during the Year of the Snake are said to be endowed with wisdom and with deep philosophical understanding. They are born thinkers who excel in finding solutions to complex problems. In matters of business they can be shrewd, biding their time in making a deal only to strike like lightning and make a killing when they judge the moment is right. Thus in life, the majority of Snakes are financially successful and generally lucky with money; their fortunes very much depend on their careful and considered judgment in financial affairs and on their intuitive feelings in business negotiations. These are clever, intelligent people who take time to formulate their ideas and opinions. Even when they are at their laziest, their minds are working overtime, laying their schemes and hatching their plots for the future.I am good at making other people money, but for as badly as I need it, and I need it really badly, I can't force, cajole or "scheme" my way into any of it. Never could. Still can't.
Snakes are wise, philosophical, calm, and understanding. They are receptive and physically alluring, often fickle. Success and fame come easily to Snakes. They can be treacherous creatures who delight in intrigue and who wouldn't think twice about double-crossing someone in order to save their own skins. Their calculating natures will never forgive or forget a slight. They can be lazy and self-indulgent. Their innate elegance can at times be ostentatious.Nearly complete twaddle. I never have double-crossed anyone, let alone plotted to. My own gain has never been more important to me than yours. My strange style, though, betimes does get ostentatious. When I'm struggling, I wear my feathers pointing in the air.
Subtle, secretive, elusive and enigmatic, there is an element of the mysterious that surrounds the Snake personality. Perhaps this is due to their intuitive faculties, or perhaps it is a consequence of their strong inner spirituality which can manifest itself in an interest in religion, mysticism or the occult.Entourage?
A Snake can be counted on to carry a project through to the end. Their decisions are quick and firm, but they are formed by first impressions, on sympathies and feelings logically assembled in their minds -- rather than by simple facts alone. The Snake will fight and plod for anything they believe in and allow nothing to stand in his or her way. At ease in all circumstances and possessing uncommon self-discipline, the Snake achieves great heights and honors in his or her career, enjoying the well deserved respect of an admiring entourage.
Snakes are a bit tight when it comes to lending money, though their sympathy for others often leads them to offer help. The help will be in kind rather than in cash, however; the Snake is freer with himself than he is with his money! The fatal flaw in the Snake's character is, in fact, a tendency to exaggerate -- in helping friends as with everything else. If a Snake does somebody a favor, he becomes possessive toward them in an odd way, so that finally he is more a hindrance than a help. The snake's serpentine nature leads him to coil and cling to the point where he can suffocate the object of his attention. Think twice then, before you accept an offer of help from a Snake; you could regret it!I have a bad reputation in my family for my generosity. I am way not a tightwad. But it's true that accepting my help might be more than you can take. I'm not sure how to fix it. I'm trying to be Zen about it.
In money matters, the Snake has good luck -- he simply doesn't have to worry about it. He will always be able to get money when he needs it, and he feels this so strongly that it has never bothered him at all. Once he has got it, though, he's a little stingy; that's why he never lends. In old age he can become quite miserly.100% twaddle. I don't lend money that often because I rarely have any to lend. I worry about it it plenty, but I have and will continue to use it on others even if I'm cutting my own nose off despite my face.
Snakes are notoriously good looking and like to project the best image of themselves that they can. Both men and women of the sign have elegant and stylish taste in clothes; the men are sexy and always have a bit of the dandy about them, and the ladies are seductive and rave over smart accessories. Whether in looks or in circumstances, Snakes simply have a magical knack of making the very best out of the most mediocre.It's true that even when I'm just running around my own house in my jammies, it has to be my way, not ordinary, but we're not talking haute couture here. No. We're just talkin' odd. Makes my mother crazy.
In Japan, those wishing to pay a woman a compliment and acknowledge her beauty are accustomed to say: "My dear, you are a real snake!" -- a pleasantry most likely to be misinterpreted in the West.Yes, well, Japanese people are maybe the strangest flavor we've got on this planet, so....
As with real snakes, which hibernate in the cold season and come out when it's warm, Snake people shine in the hot months. And the Snake born at midday in the heat of a tropical summer will be happier than one born in the middle of an icy night in winter. The destiny of those born under this sign is so sensitive to the inclemencies of climate that the almanac warns Snakes born on a stormy day that they will face danger throughout their lives.More twaddle. I hate the heat and the heat hates me. I mean that very literally. Hate is the word. Springtime kind of warm is my kind of warm.
He is capable of wielding an encompassing influence through his profound insight. He is gifted with charisma and an inquisitive nature. Shrewd and business-like, he possesses great mental abilities and powers of concentration. He is artistic, well-read but also practical, capable of managing people as well as finances. Although he assumes an unperturbed appearance when crossed, he has a long memory and can harbor lifelong grudges.I'm not big on grudges. I either forgive or forget. No one can predict what appearance will appear when I'm crossed. It ranges from me dropping to sleep on the spot, to instant decapitation... really, every reaction or non-reaction you can imagine. I'm darn artistic about that action.
They say my direction is south-southeast. If you consider that the only way I ever want to go is North, I guess you could say that my direction is south... since I'm not north enough.
Anyway, the metaphysical arts have finally been revealed to me as having once been based on real influences. I think they have been so decimated by the rise of space lizards to power that there's almost nobody left who can make anything like real sense of them now. I don't think that this can ever be recovered until the lizards are overthrown and whatever they've been hiding from us for centuries, which is a lot, has been revealed... until all that has been lost has been recovered or replaced.
That's why I'm screaming at you all the time.
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