sometimes i think i'm going to go stark raving mad

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I am SO certain that huge amounts of REAL and vitally important history are completely known and withheld that sometimes I think I could just rip out my hair. I want to fly to these places and soak up what the ions have to say. I want to get lost in a bottomless library and have the real break over me SO intensely that it transmits to you, bowls you over, leaves you gobsmacked on the floor and screaming with glee. This is how I feel.
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