even if you have a brown thumb and live in a tropical swamp

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You can grow potatoes.
Yukon Gold Potatoes with Rosemary-Lemon-Garlic Vinaigrette

6 large Yukon gold potatoes, scrubbed
Salt
1 teaspoon lemon zest
2 lemons, juiced
4 cloves roasted garlic
1 tablespoon Dijon mustard
2 tablespoons chopped fresh rosemary leaves
Freshly ground black pepper
1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil
1/4 cup canola oil
fresh parsley, for garnish

Place the potatoes in a large pot of cold water, add 2 tablespoons of salt and boil until potatoes are tender, but still firm, 12 to 15 minutes. Drain, cool, then cut each potato into rounds and wedges. You can do this up to 2 days in advance, if you refrigerate the potatoes and wait to cut them just before cooking.

Combine the zest, juice, garlic, mustard, rosemary and salt and pepper in a blender and blend until smooth. With the motor running, slowly add the extra-virgin olive oil and blend until emulsified. Can be made 1 day in advance and refrigerated. Bring to room temperature before using.

Heat cast iron skillet to med high heat. Drizzle extra virgin olive oil to coat pan and season with salt and pepper. Place the potatoes in pan cut side down, and cook until golden brown, 4 to 5 minutes. Turn the potatoes over, and continue cooking until just cooked through, about 10-15 minutes longer. Remove the potatoes and cut each half in half lengthwise and then crosswise into 1-inch pieces. Transfer to a platter and immediately drizzle with the vinaigrette and toss to combine. Garnish with parsley.
Or simply boil them and season them to taste on your plate. I don't recommend eating them raw.

Potato plants have pretty foliage and flowers. You can fool the feds yer growing them for decoration. Like poppies.
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